Are you feeling overwhelmed by work and relationship problems? In this world, there are people who can calmly move forward no matter what problems arise. They don’t possess any special talents—they’ve simply developed different thought processes. Let me introduce you to three core mindsets from Katsuhisa Kinoshita’s book “How Non-Worriers Think” that can significantly reduce life’s worries.

Distinguishing Between “Things Not Working Out” and “Things Not Going According to Plan” Can Eliminate Worries

Understanding the fundamental mechanism of how worries develop is the first step toward worry-free thinking. Many people confuse “things not working out” with “things not going according to plan,” but when you can clearly distinguish between these two concepts, most of life’s worries begin to disappear.

The Moment Worries Are Born

In many situations where we worry, we’ve set a goal, made a plan, and are trying to proceed according to that plan. However, the world is full of unpredictable elements, and our plans frequently collapse due to unexpected events. At this point, an important divergence occurs:

1. Things not going according to plan: A state where you cannot reach your goal using your initial plan or method
2. Things not working out: A state where you cannot reach the goal itself

When these two concepts are confused, people jump from the fact that “the plan has fallen apart” to the incorrect conclusion that “the goal cannot be reached,” and this is where worries emerge.

Learning from the Train Example

Let’s look at a concrete example. You planned to take a train to reach your destination in 15 minutes, but the train service was suspended due to heavy rain. There are two possible responses:

Thought Pattern 1 (The Worry Pattern): “The train isn’t running. I can’t go as planned. It’s hopeless.” You sit down and wait for train service to resume.

Thought Pattern 2 (The Worry-Free Pattern): “I can’t use the train method, but my goal of reaching the destination hasn’t changed. Let me look for alternatives like a taxi, bicycle, or walking.”

The former confuses “things not going according to plan” with “things not working out” and abandons the goal itself. The latter understands that “things not going according to plan” is merely a problem with the method, while the goal remains achievable.

Application in Business and Daily Life

This way of thinking is extremely effective in business settings as well. When a project doesn’t proceed according to the initial plan, many people think, “This project is impossible now.” However, people who don’t worry think, “This method didn’t work, but the goal itself hasn’t changed. Let’s try a different approach.”

For example:

• If response from the anticipated customer base is weak when launching a new business, change the target demographic
• If planned materials are unavailable, look for alternatives
• If a team member suddenly takes leave, reprioritize tasks

Considering the example of managing a YouTube channel, rather than giving up on the channel because one video didn’t get many views, it’s important to improve the script and editing methods and continue the PDCA cycle.

How to Form Worry-Free Habits

To make this distinction between “things not working out” and “things not going according to plan” a habit, the following steps are effective:

1. Notice your automatic reactions when problems occur: When thoughts like “It’s hopeless” arise, pause
2. Clearly separate goals from methods: Ask yourself, “What am I really trying to achieve?”
3. Actively seek alternatives: Brainstorm by asking, “What other methods are available?”
4. Take small steps: Take minor actions using the new method

When this thought habit becomes established, your flexibility in all aspects of life increases. Unexpected events become not “problems” but “opportunities for a change in direction,” and mental stress significantly decreases.

Practical Exercise

As a practical exercise to develop this mindset, for one week, write down daily instances of “things not going according to plan” in a notebook, and for each one, consider “What is the goal?” and “What are the alternative methods?” This simple habit will naturally change your response to worries.

Ninety percent of the world’s problems are merely “things not going according to plan,” and the goals themselves remain achievable. If you develop the habit of thinking, “This is just not going according to plan. Let me consider my next move,” you can eliminate most of life’s worries.

The Secret to Making Work Interesting: Developing Your “Finding Fun” Skill

What is the “Finding Fun” Skill?

The “finding fun” skill is the ability to discover enjoyment and meaning in situations or activities that might initially seem monotonous or boring. This skill isn’t innate—it can be consciously developed. Particularly in the workplace, the presence or absence of this skill creates a significant difference in daily satisfaction and long-term success.

People with highly developed “finding fun” skills can see different perspectives or deeper layers in the same job. They can identify challenges and opportunities for growth even in simple tasks, and take pleasure in small daily progress.

Specific Methods to “Gamify” Your Work

Here are concrete approaches to gamify your work:

1. Set personal achievement goals:
   • Establish challenge goals separate from regular work objectives
   • Examples: “Finish processing 10 minutes faster than yesterday” or “Achieve zero errors”
2. Think in terms of skill levels:
   • View your abilities as “levels” and daily tasks as “earning experience points”
   • Example: “I’m currently level 5. Clearing this difficult case will level me up to 6”
3. Create small rituals or personal rules:
   • Develop personal habits or rituals before, during, or after work
   • Examples: “Reward myself after three consecutive successes” or “Always focus intensely on the first task of the morning”
4. Maintain your own evaluation system:
   • Have personal standards for “good work” separate from company evaluations
   • Examples: “Count how many times a customer’s expression brightens” or “Track the number of new things I’ve learned”

Application Examples Across Various Professions

Administrative Work: Even monotonous data entry can become engaging by adding game elements like “attempting a streak of zero errors” or “beating your personal best input speed.” Alternatively, role-playing as a “data detective” who interprets business trends from the numbers transforms mere sequences of figures into meaningful information.

Sales: Sales positions with clear metrics like visit counts or contracts closed are easily gamified. Setting challenges like “secure five deals this month in a notoriously difficult area” or incorporating learning elements such as “learn at least three industry-specific terms in each customer conversation” transforms daily visits from mere quotas into growth opportunities.

Creative Professions: Designers, writers, and other creative professionals can prevent stagnation and stimulate new creativity by imposing voluntary constraints or challenges, such as “intentionally use colors or expressions I normally avoid” or “time my production process to improve efficiency.”

Know Your “Fun Type” to Gamify Effectively

What people find “fun” varies greatly. Knowing your own “fun type” allows you to gamify your work more effectively.

Achievement Type: Those who find joy in reaching goals or breaking records

• Effective gamification: Setting numerical goals, visualizing progress, breaking personal records

Explorer Type: Those who enjoy new discoveries and learning

• Effective gamification: Collecting new knowledge related to work, trying different approaches, exploring related fields

Social Type: Those who find pleasure in human interaction

• Effective gamification: Developing ways to improve conversation quality with customers or colleagues, observing others’ reactions

Creative Type: Those who enjoy the process of creating something

• Effective gamification: Adding creative touches to daily tasks, improving processes, developing unique tools

How to Develop Your “Finding Fun” Skill and Mindset

To develop your “finding fun” skill, the following mindsets are important:

1. Shift from “having to do” to “choosing to do”: Whether you feel “forced to do something” or “choosing to do something” greatly affects how enjoyable the same work feels. Developing the habit of actively thinking “Today is the day I do X” when you wake up creates a sense of agency.
2. Value “improvement” over “perfection”: Striving for perfection often leads to dissatisfaction when it’s not achieved. Instead, switching to an improvement-oriented mindset of “becoming a little better than yesterday” makes daily small progress enjoyable.
3. Emphasize “uniqueness” over “comparison”: Rather than comparing yourself with others, finding your own value and creativity allows you to discover unique enjoyment in the same job. It’s important to maintain the perspective of “how can I express my individuality.”
4. Enjoy the “process” rather than just the “result”: Having a mindset that enjoys not just achieving goals but the journey itself helps you find joy in daily work. Develop the habit of thinking, “I wonder what challenges today will bring.”

How the “Finding Fun” Skill Impacts Your Life

The “finding fun” skill enhances not just work but your entire quality of life. By honing this skill:

• Stress resilience increases
• Creativity and problem-solving abilities improve
• You positively influence those around you, revitalizing the entire workplace
• Long-term career satisfaction increases
• You develop an “eye for finding fun” in all aspects of life beyond work

Even a monotonous daily routine can become a series of adventures and growth opportunities when viewed differently. By consciously developing your “finding fun” skill, the quality of your life itself can dramatically change.

Deepening the Thought: “There Are No Bad People, Only Bad Relationships”

As a new perspective on interpersonal concerns, I’d like to explore the importance of focusing on “relationships” rather than individuals.

Practical Approaches to Changing Relationships

Here are practical methods for changing relationships:

1. Adjusting Distance: Maintain appropriate physical and psychological distance from people with whom you feel disharmony. It’s important to find the right distance based on compatibility, rather than trying to be close with everyone.
2. Revising Expectations: Excessive expectations of others lead to disappointment. Understanding the other person’s characteristics and maintaining realistic expectations reduces relationship stress.
3. Changing Communication: The same content can be received very differently depending on how it’s conveyed. It’s effective to choose communication methods that match the other person’s reception style.

Psychological Background

This approach is grounded in the psychological “Systems Theory.” Relationships are complex systems, and trying to change just one part can disrupt the overall balance. However, changing your own position or way of engaging creates ripple effects throughout the system, naturally transforming the relationship.

Application in the Workplace

This way of thinking is particularly effective in the workplace. For example:

• With colleagues who frequently have conflicting opinions, focus on formal interactions and reduce unnecessary engagement
• If there are challenges with subordinates, flexibly change your management style
• When experiencing friction with superiors, adjust your reporting methods or frequency

As an Opportunity for Self-Growth

Difficult relationships also offer valuable opportunities for deeper self-awareness. By reflecting on why you react to certain relationships and how your values or past experiences might influence these reactions, you can transform relationship problems into fuel for personal growth.

Knowing the Limitations

However, this approach has its limitations. In cases of clearly harmful relationships such as abuse or violence, self-defense or ending the relationship should take priority over relationship improvement. It’s important to recognize that not all relationships can be repaired.

Changing your behavior and thinking to transform relationships and free yourself from interpersonal worries—this approach is simple, but by putting it into practice, it has the potential to greatly enhance your quality of life.